2006年8月1日
星期天字悠人和yayawu的話還言猶在耳。尤其是字悠人那一句﹕「請想一想你希望你的父母接受福音的渴望有多大。」以及yayawu那一句﹕「榜樣最重要。」一直縈繞在我的腦海中。
當天晚上便病發了，呆在床上整夜沒睡，沒法子周一惟有曠工一天。為了彌補無眠的晚上，與及逃避身體上的痛楚，我睡睡睡，睡到下午3時許。我的父母，當然不會撒手不管我的事，早上見我沒起床上班便問這問那；因為痛，同時也不想他們擔心，我只是支吾以對。
因為痛，我的表情當然不會好，話也不想說，而且胃氣很嚴重，我根本不想吃東西，我怕一吃便吐。但是眼見父母已準備好晚餐，唯有硬著頭皮，食。吃前，隨口說了一句﹕「怎麼今天晚上飯那麼多…」因為整天沒有足夠運動，右邊大腿又拉扯著，於是我站著吃飯。他們問﹕「腳很痛嗎？」我怕他們擔心，沒有答，然後在談論電視劇情。
終於捱過晚飯，為了分散注意力，我回房間練琴。為免腰痛，隔一段時間便到客廳抱起必必，才回房繼續練習。
今天早上，醒了後在賴床，碰巧聽到爸爸與媽媽的對話。
爸﹕「做乜仲唔見佢起身，仲痛呀，又唔返工呀？」
媽﹕「點知佢啫？十問九唔應。」
爸﹕「琴晚已經想話佢喇，成晚响度玩隻貓…不過我忍住咋。睇見佢食飯個樣就慘…好想話你唔食我就倒咗佢囉。咪以為攞幾個臭錢返屋企就…」
原來，無論我如何努力，我還是父母眼中一個「衰女包」。我很難過，因為父母不明白我；他們是我的親人，不是街上的路人甲乙丙。同時我也很慚愧，因為原來我這麼多年來也沒有進步過。我還在妄想父母會因為我的「榜樣」而接受福音嗎？不要笑死街坊了…
5 comments:
"完"來如此, well ......也不知說什麼了! "old" 人家是這樣的, 當他們細路哥, 唔識"world", forgive them 吧! 大人有大量,這才是"更", 小薯看你頭的......
1.對不起，給了妳壓力！
2.家人是妳最親密的人，妳有要無論如何都會感覺/察覺得到的。所以無論你說不說，他們也會擔心妳的。所以還是和他們說說好，以免誤會。而且當妳有事而他們能有機會表示出關心，雙方的關係不是會更好嗎！
3.以我對妳父親膚淺的瞭解，我覺得是因為他明知妳有事，但你卻不和他說，令他覺得妳認為他幫不上忙而不快，所以說出那些話。
多些溝通溝通吧！
We build relationships by having trust and faith on others. Though sometimes we have our fears, we need to rely on the faith, espically with our family, to open up and really trust them. Trust is a 2-way street where communication working as the vehicles can travel back and forth. Without communication, trust is in vain, just an empty road.
It is more worrisome for your parents not to hear your worries striaght from your mouth. By you telling and sharing your ups and downs, they feel more connected to you (or understand you better) though they may not provide any solution to your situation. In simple words, they just like to hear from you, learn about your day. Don't hold back your pain and pretend you are okay in front of them, because you are sending a miscommunication to them:
- In your mind: I can't talk because I am hurting; I don't want to tell them because I don't want them to worry
- In your parents' mind: I don't know what her problem is, I do worry; but, there isn't a problem in the world that she can't tell us! Why is she acting this way?
I know it's hard to talk when it hurts so much, just tell them honestly you can't say much because of your pain but do verbalize your appreciation for what they have done for you. Showing appreciation is very important. ("Wow, so much food tonight" can be misunderstood in many ways in their ears)
Another word of caution, sometimes what is known as "being your true self" can Make you appear very blunt and even rude to others, especially to people you are very comfortable with. So be aware what comes out of you may not truly reflect what's in your heart. A little effort of packaging is always appreciated.
Don't be discouraged by what happened. Our parents are always waiting for us to come to them; they remember no more of our foolishness and mishaps as soon as we replace them with our genuine love for them. Sometimes it's necessary for us to say the courageous words of apology to clear the misunderstanding.
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其實父母親都有愛子女的心,只不過是他們亦是人,他們也會有脾氣的時候.正如,如果換個角度,你是父母的話,可能看見你的反應時,反應可能會更甚.
所以,正如 字:悠人所說,多溝通.
送上我的祝福!!
你朋友的留言好有深度呀!
小薯嘜
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